FAQ - How Do I change my relationship with food? Part 1

I think it really is an important area to explore - what's your relationship with food (and drink) like? This is the first in a series of videos in which I intend to explore this and suggest options and tactics to help shift that relationship. It is such an important factor in building sustainable approaches to health and weight management. You can check out the Restless Midlifer Podcast episode 106 for the full episode from which this video is taken - search for the title of the pod in your pod feed of choice. #weightmanagement #weightloss #weightlossjourney #coach #midlifecoach #midlifewomen #midlifemen

Dave

Dave Algeo

Midlife Health and Weight Management Coach

Reclaim your Health, Life and Sense of Adventure in Midlife and Beyond

https://www.midlifereshape.com/#weightmanagement #weightloss #weightlossjourney #coach #midlifecoach #midlifewomen #midlifemen

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Dave

Dave Algeo, Restless Mid-Lifer' It is never too late to get life back on your terms and have even bigger adventures!'dave@restlessmidlifer.com

Transcript:

what I want to do is just start to prime really your thinking around food and our food and drink I guess this could apply to but food and drink and our relationship with it because I have a feeling that what I want to do is explore this and try to start to get my thinking around this out over the next few episodes and coming weeks.

What's our relationship with food? How do I we identify ourselves as a person in relationship to the way we eat the way we live our activity or lack of that kind of thing because as I always say it's not about the diet when we're talking about health change particularly in midlife when there's a lifetime of habits embedded particularly those well -being or not so well-being habits that are embedded and rooted in

behaviours over the years that can take a lot of unpicking and that rooted behaviours often ties into coping mechanisms that we've learned over the years and built up to get through life and this ties into the relationship side that we might develop with food and drink and this is what I want to explore but for today what I want to do is just get you thinking about it and ask you that question what is your relationship with food and drink because if we think about it they're it can serve it serves or not they serve a number of purposes you know in terms of how we navigate life you've got the functional side I guess for food and drink you know that functional bit is to pretty much provide the needs of us physically and psychologically you keep the brain running the body running you're so there's the energy levels the repair the growth the functional side providing the stuff we need to get through the day-to-day but it's so much more than that isn't it it's it's become woven into the fabric of our society of our cultures and really who we are and who we identify as a person and that's why I talk about it being a relationship and that can be many fold in the sense that we can talk about our relationship to food as in how do I relate to it do I treat it as this or that and I'm going to dig in a little bit to that but there is also the fact that we can develop a relationship with food and drink that perhaps can be an alternative or something else in addition to that human relationship side of things you know we have we have human relationships in life you know that perhaps close intimate relationships family friends work colleagues that kind of thing and in terms of that relationship this is where food and drink can take on more than the functional side because does it provide something like connection does it provide something that is that can help that helps in its in its own and this is you know health helps in air quotes here um in its own way in its own predictable way

potentially to provide things that perhaps we're not getting in relationships or in a particular relationship perhaps we've developed relationship with food and drink because it gives us some sense of comfort so we we have an emotional aspect to us we have the functional side of eating um the the physical if you like the physical side um we have that emotional side to it as well and it's that relationship and this is the question I want you to think about is what is your relationship to food and is it providing an aspect there food and drink because alcohol can figure largely into this as well is it providing something in the way of comfort emotional comfort emotional num numbing some sort of balm to the to the stresses and strains and the pains of life can have we come to treat it as that trusted friend that trusted confidant or friend that we can go to and we know what we're going to get now I'm not saying there isn't a downside because obviously there is that's the challenge with it isn't it you know whether it's excess weight whether it's feeling bloated and sick after a binge or drinking too much and the consequences that come with that but that relationship for whatever reason can provide something and it's what we're getting from that and this is where that layering on of the physical with the emotional becomes a real issue and then we can add in the social because and I do differentiate I guess between this the the emotional and relationship and the social side because the social side is that it is built again into the the fabric of our cultures I guess how we interact how many times we've got the pictures it's kind of is it the expected thing we'll have a big um but a bucket of popcorn don't forget what the heck it is a bucket of popcorn or hot dog or that kind of thing or when we're out it's accepted that we have a drink or if we have a coffee we have a cake with you know the things that are kind of ingrained with celebrations what comes along with that commiserations you know even things like funerals and sad occasions so food is woven in there and there's a social element so it not only can it provide that relationship side of things that we get from the food or the drink something that perhaps is missing in other areas but it gels us together as human beings it gels us over a meal with when we're talking to people it gives us things to talk about to share whether it's talk about a particular recipe a particular this an event that we're looking forward to a meal with friends that kind of thing I know when I go on holiday um well I think most of us do this when we're going on holiday but one particular I tend to go every year with a couple of mates uh away on holiday to Spain and one of the key topics is what are we going to have to eat what are we going to have to eat each night and we'll plan it out we're planning out weeks before and to be fair I'm not sure how much planning there is because a lot it's quite predictable it's the same steakhouse the same Indians the same Chinese possibly different Chinese depending on where what's open at the time you know that kind of thing but it provides social connection and communication and shared experiences so this is the power of food and drink and this is what I want to just start to tease out and really that's my food for thought it is to get you thinking about that because if we start to explore as I do with

clients um that side of things you know in terms of after you know it's not about the diet because let's be right any diet can work pick a diet any diet now from my point of view I'd always encourage you to pick something that's based in health that's not going to be extreme that's not going to be there's going to be something you can sustain gives you all the needs physically as well as the the other side but we will then dig in you will choose potentially and my clients tend to choose what works from from the things that have worked in the past um ideas thoughts and they'll kind of shape the physical side of the the the their eating routines and rituals uh activity exercise that kind of thing what how to build in friction to the activities and exercise the exercise sorry the the food or the drink that they want to eat less of or consume less of but then we need to get into that other side don't we the habits rituals and routines

around why we're eating or prone to eating or prone to binging or snacking excessively and it can be something as simple as just being bored it can be something um related to well it's there you know and the habit is there you pick it up you see it's there so that can be dealt with but what can often what often gets overlooked but is really important is to look at the deeper side what does it actually give you and what why have these habits formed and boredom is one thing but is it because it's numbing out uh an unpleasant emotion perhaps you've had a meeting that's where you felt stressed angry frustrated and you've headed if particularly if you're working from home or you're working in the office you head for something whether it's the the chocolate supply or the crisp um the crisp the bags of crisps that are hidden in the cupboard whatever it is there's something there that triggers it and it's often around the emotional

bit and then obviously we need to build in social occasion so that's what i'm looking to tease out over the coming weeks is is where we can start out where we can identify the factors at play what can we then start to do about them and this is something that i love i love to explore i love to explore with clients i love to explore with myself um and for me it starts with that question of what is your relationship with food how do you relate to it where do you find it fills a gap where are the social aspects to it what are the physical sides the functional sides that you you recognize you do need and where does it differ between that and the additional stuff that we take in that perhaps we don't really need but it's just built around the customs the habits or the emotional side of our life so have a think about that as as you sort of navigate your week have a great week don't overthink it don't overanalyze but just start to notice without the judgment just start to notice some of those things because what i want to do is tease that out um and if you have any particular thoughts or questions around that um give me a shout dave at restlessmidlife.com i'm always interested to hear your questions particularly about that any feedback or ideas or even have a conversation if it's something you do want to explore yourself uh more deeply