The Sprout With The Most Clout. What's The One Thing?
The Restless Midlifer : Episode 43
In this episode, Dave builds on episode 41 by exploring how to identify the priority action to help you reduce the stress and strain in life in order to free your mind up further to explore your goals, wishes and hopes for your midlife. He introduces the concept of the 'Sprout with the Most Clout' and encourages you to take action and sweat that sprout.
Dave Algeo is a Restless Midlifer, searching for answers and adventure. His mission, should you choose to join him, is to seek out ways to get life back on his terms, heading in a more fulfilling direction and enhancing his health in the process. Dave is a writer, coach, and constantly curious person, striving to encourage others to live big - by identifying the small but significant things that can transform the life we are living. Join Dave as he explores how to regain the spirit of adventure and childlike curiosity whilst managing the "grown-up" responsibilities of life.
Dave's approach to making changes in life, health and direction, are rooted in his 'sprout sweater philosophy. Check out his 'Crackerjack' video here https://youtu.be/OZM4ObMSu6U to learn more about the basic metaphor. Check out episodes 30 and 31 to learn more about Dave's approach.
Visit https://www.midlifereshape.com/podcast or search for 'Restless Midlifer' in your favourite podcast feed. To find out more about the podcast, and episode show notes visit https://www.midlifereshape.com/podcast Drop Dave a line at dave@restlessmidlifer.com to ask questions, offer feedback or suggestions for future podcast content.
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Episode Crib Notes:
The What:
Remember:
Last week I shared how to start getting clear - emptying the cabbages onto paper and doing the cabbage audit. Now the thing is this might prove stressful in itself - that’s ok - go easy on yourself and allow the paper to hold and take care of those things - you have placed them onto the paper - perhaps some obvious and urgent actions or decisions have come to light. In which case they often take care of themselves - not by doing nothing but by identifying the first steps - and if you are not sure what the first step is -then a tip is to make your first step a period of five or ten minutes in which you focus on working out what the next step is - hint - the harder it is to identify what to do the more likely the first step is to seek help - reach out - and ask. Is there someone you trust who is not affected by the situation or challenge - someone you can bounce the issue off? Is there someone you know who has or is experiencing the same issue but maybe a bit further ahead than you or seems to be dealing with it more effective? Reach out - you may be surprised not just by the support you get but by the reassurance that they may not be finding it as easy ad the impression you have formed - that’s not to gloat but it is to recognise that if they have or are struggling with this but making some headway then so can you.
I want to highlight that feelings of overwhelm or being ground down most often come from looking at the big picture - I don’t mean this in terms of a helpful perspective when working on something and how that can be helpful to see how it fits into the bigger picture - I mean in this case a more destructive bigger picture focus - i.e. that of seeing only cabbages and piles of them at that! If you completed the exercise last week or even only partly completed it then you may know exactly what I mean. Your mind may well have been focused on how can. Handle this or I can’t handle all this… and subsequently we get a sense of feeling unable to cope and being out of control.
Wrong
What I see happen in these instances and what I experience myself is a powerful urge to either do something - anything and in fact as much as possible - just do stuff - multi=task open more browser tabs in my ind and work on them all - overwhelming.
Or avoid push away seek escape and allow the feeling to abate enough to return to a state of inactive denial - comfortable but inevitably nothing changes and things may only get worse
Right:
Here’s what ive learned - there’s a need to manage the emotional state of overwhelm but to recognise that in itself is not solving the underlying issue - in other words it’s not dealing with the problem - slicing and dicing the cabbage down and taking sprout sized action - that comes later and that’s what I am going to address today. But we do need to manage that emotional state - and in next week’s podcast/ live etc I will share some steps that reflect the underlying principles of overwhelm management.
Once we get a handle on our emotional state and bring it back under some rational control - then - then we can make a start with tackling the cabbages.
I share a number of approaches to this in my 31 day re-adventure programme, however, today I want to get you to think about how to get started and how to keep things manageable = for our mind - because when we start out with this process it is easy to tip back into overwhelm and then fall back into one of the two courses of action above and remember we need to take action so avoidance is not the answer, but neither is random ill considered flustered action. Ok in defence of the latter that can have an impact - we can hit upon Ione or two actions or things that really do help and in so doing move us forward but if done in the spirit of that panic or overwhelm - the question is at what cost? And how empowered do you really feel with that scattergun approach?
Mistakes:
Which brings me to a key mistake to watch out for - for those of you who have in the past found yourself resorting to simply doing something anything , many things just to address the issue - it can work, but it doesn’t. Have that same sense of empowerment - you also reinforce that this approach this high stress action approach is the way to do it. When in fact there may be a better way - one that slows things down, allows you to identify the actions that will have the greatest impact - the sprouts with the most clout as I call them - and then take that action - and in the process perhaps save time, save blood sweat and tears and may even make other things you were going to do or would normally do - unnecessary or easier
The How:
The Big Idea:
And this leads me to the how. Which is built upon the basis of a great quote which is at the heart of the book - the one thing by by Gary Keller, Jay Papasan, et al. link in show notes: https://read.amazon.co.uk/kp/embed?asin=B00D3J2QKW&preview=newtab&linkCode=kpe&ref_=cm_sw_r_kb_dp_AY7V17VEHM9BT5EC0CG1
Here’s how:
“What's the ONE Thing I can do, such that by doing it, everything else will be easier or unnecessary?”
So what we are seeking to do is not more or lots but think consider and identify the one thing that…
And as I said above if you struggle it may be reach out…