Forgetting and Remembering

MidLifer Chronicles 27

Back to Normality?

It's back to a full week this week and, yesterday, as I was getting myself set up for the week ahead, I was reminded of an experience I used to have when working in the police and returning from a long holiday period. of usually two weeks or so.

Like most, I loved my holidays, even if we weren't doing anything particularly exciting, because it gave me a chance to decompress and effectively forget about the job for a while. It would usually take a couple of days to properly unwind and then I would find myself really forgetting about the job (most times anyway). The thing was, something strange would happen when I considered getting back to work on the days or so before the return.

I would feel like I had forgotten how to actually be a cop. Obviously within 5 minutes of walking back through whatever station door i happened to be posted at, it would feel like I'd never been away, but I always found that feeling a little disconcerting, but also quite nice.

It showed the power of truly switching off, something which I have struggled with over my life, but when achieved can be incredibly valuable.

But, what it also showed me was how flexible and adaptable we can be. We can and do change and flex. Some more readily than others, but usually action and being immersed the activities that are different are what shift and change us.

How many times have you been daunted or overwhelmed by the prospect of a new role or a bug change only to find that, in time, you adapt and change, find ways to shift not only what you do, but how you see yourself?

Maybe it's being in the police that brought a sharper focus to this because change was a constant. But then where in life is that not the case now?

This brings me back to these last couple of weeks and my reflection that we can change and often don't see it until another change crashes up against it. And often, when things get easier, we don't see those changes as clearly. let's face it they aren't as uncomfortable.

The last two weeks have included a public holiday in them and I quite easily transitioned into 'long weekend Dave' without really noticing it. It's only when I come to consider this week ahead that I feel a little uncomfortable. A five day week! Man o man!

Ok, so I am exaggerating here, but it did feel a bit weird. And those well worn routines and rituals that were in place and generally running ok, needed to be dusted off again. After only two weeks.

So, my learning from this is that it can be so easy to shift into the easier habits, rituals and routines and often only takes a tweak in the outside world. For example, an extra public holiday, a long weekend away, or a series of events close together (like a stag or hen do, a family birthday weekend and a wedding in succession).

Obviously I am not saying, don't enjoy these events. They are a great part of the rich tapestry of our lives. And we really need to adapt our health plans (indeed any plans) to our lives wherever possible. But we do need to build in check points, and review times, particularly around such times, to ensure things don't continue to follow the easier path when normality resumes.

For me that looks like 15 minutes yesterday (Sunday) pulling out my diary and refreshing on what I need to ensure happens this week and how that fits with my near and far term goals. The marathon training is going well, but one week i did slip in my mileage so I need to keep that on track.

And with that 15 minute review, job done. I'm primed to get back to the routines and rituals that have been serving me well and accept it will feel a little clunky as I 'remember' how to do them again. It doesn't take long to get that feeling of being back in the swing of it. The key is to ensure I am getting back onto it sooner rather than later.

After all, one thing we can be sure of. Time continues to march on and irrespective of what we do, the hours, days and weeks will pass.

So my question to you is, how are you reminding yourself of your commitments and refreshing on those habits and practices that keep you more on track towards your goals? If you've lapsed a little, or a lot. Don't waste time on recriminations. Just pull out that plan, or journal and get back to it.

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Dave Algeo, Restless Mid-Lifer
'It is never too late to get life back on your terms and have even bigger adventures!'
dave@restlessmidlifer.com

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